It's thankful time again. I love my Grammy. She's so loving, supportive and encouraging. Those are all traits that are especially admirable to me right now. She just makes me feel like I can do anything. She's empowering and uplifting for my soul. Spending the day at her house is renewing, every time. She's also always good to remind me to enjoy every second I have with my babies, it is such a short time. This time feels like forever right now. It's really hard for me to enjoy it all the time, to cherish every whiney moment. Sigh. It is good for me to be reminded that I only have my babies for a short time. They will be big giant adults before I'm forty (and I've been told several times that 40 will come so much faster than I think it will). Ever since Supermom posted the blog about the last time she held her baby boy I've been grateful each time I hold my boy. I still rock my girl about everyday. Today we colored together and I wondered how many more times my baby girl would come to tell me it was time for me to color with her "right now." So irritating at first (she's quite bossy for her little 3 year old shorts), but when I took a moment to think about what was happening, that she just wanted me to be with her and to engage in her life for a few minutes, I couldn't help but indulge her selfish little demand. Kids are so unbelievably selfish, but what if they weren't? Would anyone give them any attention at all if they never came around and asked for it? I find them very easy to ignore (sometimes). I know that's bad and it is very definitely my selfishness showing it's ugly head. Hmm. Amazing how my children allow me to see my sins so clearly! I sometimes think that is why God gave them to me. My precious little mirrors.

I am missing my man again. I still talk to him every night, but it's just not the same as him being here. I finished cleaning off the back patio today. I threw away all the old yucky chair cushions and I had a hard time carrying all the over-sized heavy black trash bags to the front curb. It was a small misery. There I go whining again. No whining allowed. I wonder if God feels about my whining the way I feel about my children's whining? I wonder if He's pulling His hair out and crying, "What am I going to do with her?!?!" "Why won't she just listen to me without complaining?" Do you think God thinks things like that? My real question is...Do I need to change the way I think and feel about my kids' whining or do they need to stop whining or both maybe? I guess I feel the way I do about their whining partly because I think they should not do it. I just don't have a lot of pity/mercy at the end of the day. I am tired and tired of hearing it. Those are the times that are hard to cherish. And now I have almost gone full circle. Just to make it a complete circle... I love my Grammy and today I am especially thankful for her impact on my life.